Category Archives: Straight Up CRAP

The Backlit Afro

Backlit Fro

What ever happen to the days of the backlit afro? When it was cool to surround yourself in a luminescent halo of perm? Kinda akin to the baby Jesus.

De Blasio recently rode his son’s afro into the NYC Mayor’s Office, but I have yet to see a backlit-afro-fade-in used to its full crowd-illating magnificence. Opportunity lost, if you ask me.

Well, we can’t say the same about Lionel “The Lion” Richie. He obviously knew how to use this effect to its utmost potential.

This beautiful practice has gone the way of the Bouffant; crushed and repressed by the rise of  Jheri Curl, which effectively trended the afro-toting community into letting their Soul Glow.

This CRAP goes out to Marco Stevie Come Inside. If lovin’ the Lord is wrong, he don’t wanna be right!

So fine, don’t you agree,

CRAP-MAN

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Last night I had the strangest dream…

I sailed away to China, in a little rowboat to find you, and you said you had to get your laundry cleaned.  Didn’t want no one to hold you…WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!

CRAP-MAN

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KLF

Take cover.

I’m gonna kick this HARD and you can catch it,

CRAP-MAN

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The day we reached the sky

I’m takin’ you back, with a special request from our man 50 grand, Rishar rishar. Enjoy the memories.

He’s a good holy man,

CRAP-MAN

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No More Tears

Just spent the entire morning in the emergency room with Larkin and my ex-wife. Larkin got her first real wound, a large cut under her chinage. It happened while she was climbing her toy chest and my ex was in the kitchen. Luckily it happened with my ex and not with me, because I would have gotten crucified for neglect. It was still my fault anyway, for teaching Larkin how to climb…

It was nothing too major, but my ex tends to panic…and luckily I’m the only one she knows to call in these situations. At first the doctors said Larkin needed stitches, but in the end they just crazy-glued it. She was a trooper and I am in some way proud of how she handled her first real injury. It’s almost like a right of passage. There will be more, I’m sure, but hopefully they are as easily dispatched.

I’m late for a class, but this too will not keep me away from our Tears for Fears Week climax. Stay strong.

Let it all out,

CRAP-MAN

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Heels Over Head

Just returned from a two hour jam session at the old Bim Bum Park. Larkin, apparently, can’t keep up with her old man, because she was smoked and has passed out. This gives me just enough time to grace you all with our Thursday edition of this slammin’ Tears for Fears tribute week.

I’ve always wondered, why the idiom is “head over heels”? If you are sent for a loop, shouldn’t it be “heels over head”. I know I’m constantly head over heels. Something happens and we’re all head over heels. What happened? CRAP happened.

One little boy – one little man,

CRAP-MAN

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Have no fear

Tears for Fears week continues:

You better behave,

CRAP-MAN

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